Pressure of performance

Overheard this conversation from the Boss’s cabin. My cubicle is next to him. My Boss is a 74 year old adorable Canadian-American, who takes good care of me. He says I am like a little girl and it is like having his grand daughter around. 😀
He hired a new Project Engineer for our R&D team, and he is an Indian. He is from my boss’s previous company and that is where I had interviewed first with ze boss.

My boss to the new Indian guy at work : “Oh, you have met PB before, she is really good, blah blah blah…”

Indian guy : “ Oh, that is good to know”

Boss *Chuckling* : She is quite cheeky, has a great sense of humor. Makes everyone laugh all the time.”

Indian guy : *Smiling politely*

After a while,

Indian guy : “Hey, how are you? Good to see you again!”

Me : “I am good! Congrats on the new job, and welcome aboard!”



Happy anniversary!

My sweet blog,

It has been 2 years since your birth today, and I feel absolutely amazing that you are existing, thriving and growing by the day.
I love you for giving me a chance to jot down my feelings, my craziness and my creativity. Thanks to you, I have had a chance to get in touch with new people and see their shades of life.
I am glad that you became my palette to mix my colors and my brush to paint my readers lives.
More than that, I am thankful that you are my canvas to splash on.

Lots and lots of love,
Princess Butter.


Test for A

I have a BFF who I am close to. She says she has read this blog once after I gave her the name of my blog. And then she asked me the name again yesterday. She does it for pictures, mails, etc as well. “I forgot/I did not see. Please tell/send again.”
So this is a test for you A. I had sent you this poem last year on your birthday. If you read this space, leave a comment. I am going to note when you read and comment. That will decide what I get for you when I come to India.

I met a silly girl,
she was really silly.
For the complete lack of imagination,
lets call her Silly.

Silly girl is such a nut,
to the point of being a prat,
when it comes to sweet animals,
she’s such a scaredy cat.

Silly girl loves talking to everyone,
made us almost miss our trains.
But I am the only one
whom she causes max hurt and pain ;’-)

Silly girl loves her Copper chocs,
and stole my idea of going to Chinese room.
That makes me want so badly
to hit her with a broom.

Always dressed in blacks,
or browns and muddy greens.
Whenever in salwar kurtas
its a sight to watch her preen.

Silly girl wouldnt wear some floaters
cuz they had a yellow mark.
She wouldnt be caught dead,
in colors bright and happy as a lark.

Silly girl loves texting,
clickety clickety click,
even in the middle of conversations,
she’s that big a prick!

Silly girl has a scarf,
super dirty and smelly.
Whenever asked to trash it,
all she does is dilly-dally.

Silly girl was born on 1st march,
the weirdest of all dates.
Just to rhyme something with that,
she should change her name to Kate.

Anyways, I love that silly girl,
even with her stupidities willy-nilly.
So why did I write so much for you?
Just to say Happy B’day, Silly!

P.S. This silly girl wears bright stuff now and is happily married since November’13. But she will still call normal function types sarees ‘zhaang pang’. I do not understand her dictionary.


Of random stuff… 2

My randomness returns. Have a million things going on in my head. This randomness helps me break away from that randomness.

1. I am a hypochondriac. I am always convinced I have some or the other disease. I self-diagnose my symptoms using Dr. Internet, and then self-treat, and refuse to go to the real doctor. But when I do, I am usually right about my symptoms and medication options. *For the win!* I have to self-treat my cold and sore throats in the US anyways. I had bought my Pune Dr’s prescription for treating 20 days of sickness.

2. I wear a gold ring and a chain, that was given to me by my maternal grandpa and my dad respectively, for my naming ceremony in my 6th month. The ring is on my left pinky. The chain has a cute golu molu Ganpati pendant(21st birthday). The chain is short now and just goes around my neck. But it was sort of rubbing against my neck and breaking my hair in clumps. Also, it fell off once or twice. So, I have started wearing it as a bracelet on my left wrist. I also wear a ring on my right middle finger(18th b’day) and the same gold ear-rings since class 7th bought in Ratlam with my cousins. I have gold 2nd piercings too. I just realized that is a lot of gold. But pretty, dainty and delicate gold. Anymore, and I might just look like Bappi da.

3. My friend VS(a guy, not Victoria’s Secret), from my class in engg college, said I blink really slow. Like really abnormally slow. He said he could count 1-2-3 during my blink.

4. I like shopping, like a normal girl would. But I HATE shoe shoppin. I have tiny feet and I need a shoe size 5-5.5-6 depending on the brand(USA), which is tiny and usually not available. Also, I don’t wear heels, because of flat feet and sort of a self-diagnosed bunion. But I don’t like ballet flats which show toe cle*v*ge. 😦

5. Princess Butter stays away from hand bags. If I had my way, I would still carry backpacks everywhere. I have carried backpacks for eating out, movies, dates. I lived through college with my red backpacks. I just cannot make myself carry handbags on my shoulder or the crook of my arm. Ugghhh. I can still manage a tote and I find sling bags comfortable. The xBF had gifted me a faux black leather, formalish sling bag to carry to work. It goes everywhere and not just to work. His last gift to me was a Steve Madden tote/sling/handbag with different straps. I am yet to use it. It is in the ‘shall be preserved for a long time before use’ museum with other clothes/accessories. I like to keep new things new for REALLY long. Hehehe!

Thats all for now. Adios amigos.


Being a Cosmozen

I have three email ids that I use apart from my office email id. A yahoomail, which was my first and now used for facebook and offers and such spammy stuff, my gmail, which is for all contact purposes and another gmail, for my blog. My id on yahoo has the word ‘cosmozen’ in it. I had read the late Kalpana Chawla, a great astronaut that I respect and admire, use this word to describe herself and for being ‘a citizen of the universe’. I found it very apt to use it for myself, because I believed I did not really belong to any particular place in India. I have always had trouble answering when people asked me where I was from. I moved to Pune in 9th grade, so now I can comfortable say that I am from Pune(and I love the sound of it!).

A lot of people ask me about my family’s origin. My family has been pretty nomadic since the beginning. All of my family members are far flung across half of India. I would like to document what I know so that someday I can show this to my next generation when they get confused where they are from originally, just like me!

Beginning from my mother’s side, which is a little more complex than my father’s, she has lived most of her life as a single woman, with her 3 sisters in Ajmer, Rajasthan, where I was born too. My mom’s great grandfather belonged to Ajgaon(Ratnagiri district in Konkans), Maharashtra. He moved out of it in search for jobs. My Ajoba(grandfather) was born in Mahitpur, Madhya Pradesh, and grew up in Indore(Madhya Pradesh). Then, he got a job in the Indian Railways and moved to Fasilka, then Punjab, now Haryana. My Aaji(grandmother, was born and brought up in Akola(Jalgaon district), Maharashtra. After their marriage, he moved to Rajasthan. My aunts (and the other babies who did not make it), were born and brought up initially in several Rajasthani villages/towns like Surajgarh Shekhawati, Naraina, Sanganer, Sikar, with mom being born in Akola, and finally settled in Ajmer where my Ajoba built a wonderful house where I spent my happy first 6 months and then several summer vacations. Two of my aunts are based in Jaipur and one in Ratlam(Madhya Pradesh).

My father’s family hails from a village called Raver(Jalgaon district), Maharashtra. A century ago, my great grandfather moved to Indore for his job in the collectorate office. My Appa(grandfather) was born and brought up in Indore, while my Aaji was born and brought up in Akola, just like my other Aaji. My grandfather worked and retired as a principal and English Master of the biggest Marathi high school in Indore. Indore has a very prominent Mahrashtrian population, with their own Marathi Samaj and their events. There are Samajs(if that is a word) in Jaipur, Delhi, Ahmedabad also. My father and his three siblings were born and brought up in Indore itself and went to the said school. My dad says it was very embarrassing to be in the same school where my grandfather worked. All his mischiefs were reported straight to his father! Haha!

My cousins are widely spread in Jodhpur, Mumbai, Pune, Ahmedabad, and in Southern California.

My parents had an arranged marriage in Indore. I started living in Indore in my 8th month. We moved to New Delhi(1st to 2nd grade), Ahmedabad(3rd to 5th grade), back to Indore(6th to 8th grade), and finally in Pune(9th grade to BE). Now I live in California, but I can confidently say that I am from Pune. In my 11th and 12th, my dad lived in Mumbai alone for a job he had there. For the record, my father and his extended family are the only people with the surname in the world. It could have been Raverkar, but instead is a really weird name, that sounds like a food item. My dog was born in Indore and brought up in Pune. Well, he is a part of the fam, so needs to be documented too.

With my family living in so many different places, there have been various advantages and disadvantages. I am not going to count the disadvantages now, because I have already posted about it earlier, and I am trying to move away from them and see only the positive picture now. We have experienced so many parts of India. My mom cooks wonderful food incorporating Mahrashtrian, Rajasthani and north Indian flavors in her recipes. Only my dad’s Marathi is perfect, like all his other language skills, including Gujarati. My mom’s Marathi and mine, well, is like a newbie talking. Our hindi is perfect and is the primary language we converse in at home. My dad speaks to me often in Marathi. But when my mom does, it sounds very unnatural, and I feel like she is going to scold me for something. Living in so many different places, we have experienced amazing cultures like, Dilli ka soft and succulent Paneer and chaat, A’bad ka kite flying, fafda-jalebi and the wonderful dandiya, Indore’s unmatched street food and sweets, and my most favorite school, and finally Pune’s lively Mahrashtrian cultural mix and the youthful energy. I feel lucky that I have experienced so many flavors in my lifetime and hopefully will continue experiencing the same. It makes a great conversation starter and has made me a bundle of anecdotes and stories. Maybe that is the reason I love travelling so much and being all touristy or nomadic. We made it a point to see everything we could around the parts of India we lived in.

So, when I read Kalpana Chawla using the term ‘Cosmozen’, I felt very drawn to it. It makes me feel belonged and grounded, but not tied to down to a spot. It makes me feel like I am flying, yet my feet are rooted to a place I call home. I may be a jetsetter in the future, and I feel ready to face it with happiness and a thirst to experience it all.

I shall welcome any travel with open arms!

Writing this post left me with such a warm and fuzzy feeling for some reason. Whenever I feel lost and uprooted, I am going to come back and read this post, to remind myself of why ‘Cosmozen’ is such a cool term.