A lot of people have been asking me to chronicle more dates or setups that are going on in my life. I feel extremely sad to disappoint you all, and myself, that there aren’t a lot of those things going on even now. At this juncture, the past is out of the window, but it takes all the effort to not be a 3 year old who says ‘eww’ and blushes when someone mentions a boy.
I have spoken to a few people, and met 3 so far. The first was depressing, with his hypothetical question and declaration that he may move back at any point to India and he doesn’t mind living in a one bedroom apartment with his parents. I was too stunned the whole time to react and he took that as me being high. Yes, he asked me that. And I was not, I promise.
The second one went alright, but the dude got back with his girlfriend, with both of us clear after the first date itself that we were better friends than as a couple.
The third, was a bit of a basketcase when it came to communication and definitely needs a mention here.
So, I came across this guy and let’s call him Mr. Y. He was from a town close to my city back in India but he went to college in my city before moving to US for his grad school and work. He is an IT guy and he definitely was the kind who studied all his life, and aspires to work for the Silicon Valley bigwigs. He told me within a few moments of the date that he is getting interview calls already from Facebook and Google. I did not feel like telling him that they call literally every techie in California, with a lot of my friends actually succeeding the interview rounds. Anyhow, here goes the timeline of our exchanges.
Saturday was when we started texting each other and it was a short exchange of 3-4 texts where he confirmed to call on the next Tuesday at 7.30 pm. It sounded more like a corporate meeting scheduling than a getting to know each other conversation.
Tuesday, he texted at 7.30 pm to check my availability to answer the damn call. I called him back right away and we spoke for 20 min, where there were really long pauses and I could hear a very slow and sad background music that could exist in that part of my biopic if ever made. Towards the end of that call, we agreed to text on Friday to confirm a spot to meet on Saturday for a date.
Friday evening arrived, with clockwork precision, Mr. Y texted and asked if a Starbucks would be fine. I asked if he would like to go to some other coffee shop, and that I had a few nice places on my Yelp list. We decided on Portola in Costa Mesa because it is adorable with it’s industrial interiors and I have always wanted to go there.
Saturday afternoon, we met at the coffee shop, talked for around an hour, and yet I left from there feeling like I did not know him AT ALL! The only recall value was how nice my coffee was, he liked NBA, and he had a Scuba license that he told me 3 times about. My impression of him was a vanilla software techie, with a Scuba diving license. One thing irked me big time was the way he was pronouncing my city’s name. It bothered me way more than it should have! We left the cafe after telling each other that we’ll text and stay in touch and see how it goes from thereon.
10 day later, until Tuesday, I saw no message or call from him. I was sort of mad at him for not even sending a polite text like it was nice seeing you, or something sweet. So, in all my anger and ego, I texted him that since we have had no communication with each other, we may as well end it here. My outlook is, if either of us would have felt inclined to meet again, we would have texted.
On Wednesday, Mr. Y replied apologizing for a late reply. His reason was that he was unsure of what to reply because he thought the meeting was great and he was going to suggest to meet a few more times. I was so confused! Because at what point did he think that I knew about him wanting to meet more! Anyways, I decided to be nice and offered to meet again and give him a second chance. And I waited.
Until another 10 days later, on Saturday again. I swallowed my pride and I messaged him only to find out that he was in San Jose with his friends. I talked about food(because that’s my fav topic) for a few minutes and told him that I was running the St. Paddy’s 5k like every year the next day, Sunday.
Monday, he messaged asking how my run was. I said that it was very fun and I had a great time with my friends. He said ‘nice.’ That was it. Those were our last sentences to each other. It has been more than a month.
Such a lack of attention is a turnoff for this princess. I don’t understand. There were 20 messages to each other in a span of 1.5 months almost. Is he still thinking that we got along very well, and has he assumed we will be meeting more? Only God and Mr. Y know!
12 thoughts on “Dating Tales : Boy 4 : Date 1”
Let me explain that I clicked on Like because I enjoy reading your posts, not because I was happy with your experiences. I am also happy that I am in a long stable marriage because I couldn’t survive in today’s world of dating. The idea of trying to have a meaningful conversation through texts sounds so unsatisfactory to me. But then, i’m a geezer. May things get better for you.
I am glad you don’t have to deal with the stupidity these days. Haha
I completely agree with you. But it’s still nice to text and talk both. I wasn’t getting any attention from this guy, and that is not ok for Princess.
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Well, yes, I understand that you were not given the attention that you deserve. My oversight. Perhaps you need to be spending time with men rather than boys.
I texted him that since we have had no communication with each other, we may as well end it here.
I love you for this, PB!
My two cents: Mr.Y deserves no more attention from PB.
Right?! I am so done.
Hi PB, you have taken the initiative twice… so don’t waste any more time on this loser!
Hai na? Dropped him for sure.
Haha dating stories are so much fun in hindsight.
I spoke to a similar Mr. Y who set an appointment to make the call. We spoke exactly thrice in 3 weeks with no texts in between (then neither of us called or texted, so we both just ghosted each other, I kind of liked him but not enough to call back again).
The three conversations we had- there were no silent pauses, we kept asking questions and narrating different stories from our lives. But in the middle of every conversation he would say – oh it’s been an hour since we have been talking, I got to go now, we’ll talk later.
It seemed like he had set some alarm haha, or maybe he had a lot of numbers to call and he could only allocate an hour per person 😛
They need some soft skills classes. Some people simply don’t learn how to talk to opposite genders! Or human!
Going through the same phase😢
There there… hugs!