20

I am an adult. Really?

I will be turning 27 this September’14. I feel old. I feel I need to start using anti-ageing skincare soon. My eyes are all crinky at the corners because I have small eyes, I wear contact lenses and I squint a lot.

The great father of mine says I am getting old only physically. Mentally I am a 5 year old still. I am all responsible and money-wise and know my priorities and all that. But my behavior and my talks don’t say that I am 27 AT ALL! I feel even more like a kid when with certain things I am supposed to show maturity and behave like an adult. I have to make some awkward confessions here.

In my line of work, a certain part of the pump/bolting mechanism is called a n*pple. I am putting an asterisk here to avoid creepskates googling and landing on my blog. Everytime I here that word, I giggle. I have to control my laughter so that people at work don’t think of me as a weirdo. I hear the word being said atleast 5 times during the day. And each time, I crack one rib trying to stifle my laughter.

Whenever someone mentions Dick’s Sporting Goods, I can hear laughter in my head. If I am driving and I pass the store, I laugh out loud. I just cannot help it! Same with the character Dick in Enid Blyton’s Famous Five. Oh Lord! It made reading Famous Five very awkward after I was 13-14.

Many times, when I see newly married couples from my school/college, the first thought is, have they done it , yet? I see some girls or guys, and I have a hard time imagining if they must be doing it at all! Holy cow! I almost have to smack myself to make such weird thoughts go away. It is very very embarrassing for such ideas creeping in my head. Thankfully, I am not alone. A couple of my friends are guilty of that as well. Also, getting pregnant is like, the stamp that you have had s*x. How are you supposed to tell your parents that you are pregnant! 😀 I am very embarrassed to admit this all here, but hey! I am being honest here!

There are times when I talk to my mom about my dog’s s*x life(actually the lack of it, but no lack of trying from our side). She tells me stuff in details of how they got the female, which is usually one of the half adopted strays that my mom feeds, and how it got very exasperating and how my dog was being a nutjob. I can hear my dad yelling in the background at my mom and I, to stop talking like crazy because we both are in fits of laughter.

Sometimes I watch Ellen DeGeneres’s youtube clips and there is a writer named Andy on her show. She has called him on stage a couple of times and made him say some stuff.

Watch this clip here, courtesy The Ellen Show.

The way he reacts is so similar to how I behave!

Siggghhh. I am 27. I think it is about time I stop the giggles and be more mature.

So, I have to buy some new gym clothes. I will go to Dick’s Sporting Good tonight. *Breaking into a goofy giggle in my cubicle* 😀

ETA: Read Pepper’s wonderful post here and feel good that we arent perverts, but perfectly normal. Also read thisfor just a lovely post about being a child-woman. I am very similar to what she has jotted down. I say ‘wheee’ when my car goes down the slope. 😀

8

Of sun, snow and crazy floods

It is a pleasant 14-15 deg C outside. Rest of the USA is freezing under the insanely cold Arctic winds. It is pretty much a 100 deg difference between Chicago and Southern California. Gotta love SoCal! I stepped outside last Saturday in my gym shorts to do my groceries. It felt amazing in the lovely cool weather to have the sun rays splashing on my skin. It just makes me so happy to get warmed up by sun.

But I am also jealous of the mid-west to the east coast! So many people are contacting me if I am okay, or warm enough and to take care. It is almost an anti-climax when I tell them I am sitting in my room with my small fan on. Gee, by the sound of their voices, it definitely feels like I let them down or something. Hey! I don’t control the temperatures!

My friend Mo left USA for India 2 days back and yesterday her city Atlanta experienced 3 in of snow, which is rare for Georgia. Apparently, all hell broke loose! There were choked up traffic jams, people had to sleep in offices, kids in malls and stores. School buses, ambulances, cars were struck. People from her office left after a day and had to sleep there itself. She just escaped the whole tamasha. I almost feel she should have experienced that, just because it will be a great story to tell! Mo, please don’t kill me for this! 😉

Well, I always feel whenever something happens, people only say ‘we just missed it by a week, a day, an hour.’ I am glad it is like that, but I would like to hear something from the horse’e mouth someday. If everyone just missed it, who the hell experienced it??

Well, jokes apart, just the fact that Atlanta went through this mess has made national headlines here. Similar snow fall had happened in 2011 and the city was simply paralysed. They had just 4 equipment to deal with it and the situation was simple way worse that time. I read it is better this time(relatively) because they are well equipped with snow removal equipment now, both in quantity and quality. When I compare this to Mumbai getting stunned by rainfall year after year, I pretty much want to jail the government incharges for life. I can still remember seeing the ambulance stuck in traffic and the driver stepping out to see if there was a way in the rain. It was not even heavy rains. Those were some of my last visuals of Mumbai while going to the airport in June’13. I could only pray for the person inside. Even in Pune, when it is known that every year, there is a period of heavy rain, and normal rain otherwise, why does it wreak havoc on the city? My ground floor house was flooded 5-6 years ago and destroyed a lot of our stuff. Obviously we don’t even expect any compensation. Due to the drain blockage, the rain water was collecting in the building parking lot. We were anxiously watching the water reach the 1st to 3 rd step on the door. And then, I saw disgusting water starting to come out of the Indian toilet and bathrooms. Ugggghhhh! And in minutes, the whole apartment had 4 inches of water. Thankfully, foreseeing the rapidly rising water, my mom and I had started to pile up stuff on the dining table and on top of the bed and other higher levels and let her tuition kids go home. But the clothes, beddings, stuff kept in the bed storage, was pretty ruined. I tripped and fell in that gross water while picking up my confused dog to take him upstairs to my neighbors. The water receded after a couple of hours and my dad, after coming home from work, promptly got into cleaning with my mom and neighbor aunties. He is one crazy fellow. He went to show people the hole in the backyard wall he had made to let the water flow away, and every time ended with his chappal flowing away and he splashing around to retrieve it. Crazy!

My mom and I slept at the neighbors’ place for the night, while my dad slept at my place in the living room. We had to keep the windows open to let the stink go away and poor dad had to volunteer for security. Haha! Now my parents, empty out the bottom drawers of the cupboards every year before monsoon. We are really looking forward to moving to our 4th floor new apartment soon and avoiding this whole drama.

Needless to say, that day, I was very busy taking care of my dog’s tummy rubs, so I pretty much did nothing to help.